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Poopy-Bottomed Demon Child

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On the Radio

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Chronicles of the Sleepless and Damned

I just hit Lily’s crib so hard that I think I broke my hand. Really helped. too. I imagine she feels really secure in there right now. I also screamed back at her in rage, hit myself repeatedly in the head with my hand and shook said crib, hard. All in an attempt to get her to just GO TO SLEEP AND STAY ASLEEP DAMNIT. No one heard me and came to my rescue. Probably more significantly, no one came […]

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Dr Bradigan, DDS, Gun Runner

Today was Sam’s second dentist appointment. He’s been looking forward to it all week, for reasons he never really articulated. Generally, I think he likes being the center of attention, no matter what form. Once we were there, he sank into himself, a little, huddled just a bit in the chair. I could tell he was nervous, but I stayed in my chair, across the room, smiling, relaxed, and he relaxed too. He eyed each instrument as she presented it, […]

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Three Shots (and

It was Sam’s annual check-up today, an event he’s been preparing for by reading Blue’s Check-up and conducting mock doctor’s appointments for months. He enjoyed himself vastly as they checked his vision and his hearing , weighed him, measured him and produced, as promised, an otoscope and a stethoscope. He was most pleased, and reasonably charming. Until the medical student and doctor exited, and the nurses arrived. They tried to be nice. One, a gregarious, gigantic guy named Kevin, was […]

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Big News and Excuses (and Too Much Information for Dad)

We’ll be adding a third devil to the pack in March. I couldn’t blog about it until I told my mom, now, could I? And I couldn’t tell my mom without some good concrete info about a due date, and I couldn’t get good concrete info about a due date without an ultrasound, and I couldn’t get an ultrasound until they managed to squeeze me into their insanely busy schedule. Why no pre-existing info about a due date? Because my […]

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Chug Chug Chugging along

I’m on target to finish the draft. I am really going to do it this time. It’s really, really going to happen. Not just if I tell you ten times it might be true, but really. Oh, and there’s the little matter of a professional, paying assignment to get done this week and next, too, but I feel good. I can do it. I can pull this off. Work is heating up for R., which makes my duties on the […]

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Hey,

I was at a party over the weekend, an actual, honest to god, here’s a loud band and some food and some drink party (dancing to 60’s and 70’s standards under the stuffed heads of decapitated animals, an unexpected party from the pov of me in my twenties but a fun one just the same). The band took a break, and my friend L sidled up to me and hissed “hey, let’s slip outside for a cigarette.” For jsut a […]

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How Are You Feeling?

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Fairy Tales

Fairy tales just aren’t PC, friends. They’re violent. Kings kill princes, fathers fling their daughters out in the snow, the wolf chows down on Grandma. They’re horribly insensitive to gener issues. Girls want to marry the prince, and even if they manage to do something clever or save themselves, marriage is their portion. Fathers promise their daughter’s hands without consulting her, beauty and charm are all important, etc. They’re heavily dependant on social class. Servants live belowstairs, masters above. Paupers […]

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A Little Test. Oh, and the Fish Dies Again.

Reddy #2 died. Full disclosure to Lily, who flushed him herself and agreed to adopt Sam’s dramatic looking swordtail, which he agreed to if he was allowed to help name it. So, Lightening, who’s been alive in the tank for nearly a week now, becomes Lily’s special fish. He’ll probably be belly-up tomorrow. So bedtime rolled around with excruciating slowness after a very long day. Lily’s been making bedtime a thing of misery and threats for weeks now, and tonight […]

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Sam is on the job.

Sam is on the job. Originally uploaded by kjda. KJ

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The top of Holt’s Ledge

The top of Holt’s Ledge Originally uploaded by kjda. KJ

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Haircuts!

Haircuts! Originally uploaded by kjda. KJ

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Breakfast at lou’s

Breakfast at lou’s Originally uploaded by kjda. This was our reward for a morning of shoveling snow. School was delayed…but they were late anyway!

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An easter tragedy

An easter tragedy Originally uploaded by kjda. KJ Dell’Antonia (Please attribute any drastic spelling and punctuation errors to my poor thumb-typing and creative autocorrect.)

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A very confused caterpillar

A very confused caterpillar Originally uploaded by kjda. KJ Dell’Antonia (Please attribute any drastic spelling and punctuation errors to my poor thumb-typing and creative autocorrect.)

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50 miles!

50 miles! Originally uploaded by kjda. KJ Dell’Antonia (Please attribute any drastic spelling and punctuation errors to my poor thumb-typing and creative autocorrect.)

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New bed!

New bed! Originally uploaded by kjda. KJ Dell’Antonia (Please attribute any drastic spelling and punctuation errors to my poor thumb-typing and creative autocorrect.)

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Good Morning New Hampshire

Good Morning New Hampshire Originally uploaded by kjda. Downtown… KJ Dell’Antonia

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What we really did today…

What we really did today… Originally uploaded by kjda. KJ Dell’Antonia

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Adventures in Adoptoblogland

I got an impulsive email from Guoji Familia this morning–she, Cupcake, Spark and her #2 son were heading our way! We met up at the Montshire, and hung for the morning. It was great to meet up “IRL”, but I’m finding the whole thing inspires me to talk in what I think of as “blogher” talk…lots of exclamation points and references to the ‘net. We had a good time, and bonded over plenty–adoption, of course, kids the same ages, yadda. […]

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Wanna Know What I Think about Swine Flu?

You’ll have to head over to Word of Mouth at NHPR.org to hear me still being funny about it! Today I’m feeling less clever, since rumors are spreading that China will close down adoption activity until things sort themselves out one way or another. Rory’s in good hands, though, and if things get worse–well, they get worse. And if they don’t, I’m confident it will pick back up quickly. I’m sticking to my vague June travel plans until forced to […]

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Best. Shoes. Ever.

Best. Shoes. Ever. Originally uploaded by kjda Dear Donald Pliner Thank you so much for the lovely comfy shoes. I walked. I danced. I did the horah carrying Wyatt. I picked up Lily and danced some more. And not one time all evening did my feet hurt at all. You rock, Donald Pliner. KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

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Mob Scene in the Forbidden City

Here’s a phrase you may want to learn if you’re going to bring a lot of small, blonde children to China: Ta-men pu yao. That’s “They don’t want it.” Ta pu yao is “He doesn’t want it.” The smog today was palpable, settling down in the Forbidden City to the point where you felt like you needed to clean your glasses, even though you weren’t wearing any. It was muggy, cloudy and oppressive. While we walked to the Forbidden City […]

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Lessons Not Learned

I was hoping we might all learn a little gratitude for much we have and a little understanding of how little we need from this, but my five-year-old is having a tantrum because there is no ice for her coffee.

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So. Tired.

The real trouble with the whole quarantine thing is that it sucked a lot of the adventure right out of us. We’re tired. We’ve eaten a lot of things we might not otherwise have eaten. We’ve hung out together. We’ve talked to people. We’ve been stared at. And now we are ready to resume our normally scheduled programming, but we still have a week of travel to go. Rory is adjusting well. She kind of collapsed today and took an […]

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How Lucky We Are

How Lucky We Are Originally uploaded by kjda Four kids, so far, is surprisingly not orders of magnitude more difficult than three. (of course, we cheated by not adding a baby). Things I expect to be difficult–like taking two three year olds who are asleep in the car to the grocery store, or taking them all to the pool–so far have underceded my expectations. (Is that a word? It should be.) If the difficult days are yet to come–the teenage […]

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Two Months Ago

Two Months Ago Originally uploaded by kjda I sat on this bench, in this museum, with another adoptive parent and her recently at home daughter…and never really thought this would happen. KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

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Do you Snuggle Post Time-Out?

Ok, so I sent Rory to her room today–probably for a slightly lame reason, but there it is–sometimes I give one or the other the “go to your room” line and then I think, well, that wasn’t really a big deal–but once I’ve said it, there we are. They’re used to it; they march. Rory has marched, but today she didn’t…I had to deliver her. I went up to release her pretty quickly. The point is, unless there’s some dramatic […]

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Tomorrow’s dinner!

Tomorrow’s dinner! Originally uploaded by kjda KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

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I want you go now, Mommy.

Tonight was the open house at Lily, Wyatt and Rory’s Montessori preschool. Rory was very angry that I refused to leave; this did not comport at all with what she had been told about school, which she clearly has conceived of as a place that she will go and be relieved of my constant supervision and insistence that things be done my way…boy, is she in for a surprise! The teachers have been warned…if they’re not in charge, she will […]

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World’s Cutest Card Sharks

World’s Cutest Card Sharks Originally uploaded by kjda KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

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News Flash: Not Everything is About Rory

Or having four kids instead of three (or two, or one, for that matter). At some point over the weekend I said to myself “Self, you have got to quit this blaming it all on Rory/having four kids business.” I had bad days before we had Rory. I had days when I felt like I would never get out of the house, that the dishes would never be done and the laundry would never be washed (Full disclosure: I have […]

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Happy Halloween!

Happy Halloween! Originally uploaded by kjda KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

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Playing Family

Lily, Rory and Wyatt are devotedly and cooperatively playing an enthusiastic game of family with Rory’s doll house. (“Special for me!” but she lets them play. Sometimes.) So far I’ve heard the children go for an airplane ride, someone prepare dinner and ask how a school day was, a very convincing crying baby (that caused Rob to worriedly consider a rescue, but I was pretty sure it was faux, and I was right) and now, some kind of building. The […]

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What I Think About When I Think About Running

What I Thinl About When I Think About Running Originally uploaded by kjda How many people do you think were really walking and only started running because they heard you coming? KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

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The Unbearable Unfairness of Windows

It gets dark early, here. Which means if we go anywhere in the warm, cozy car, all snuggled into our car seats, any time after 4:30…sleep is very likely to overtake both Rory and Wyatt. And I am sorry, but you CANNOT NAP after 4:30 here. In fact, you really can’t nap at all, with occasional exceptions for illness, early dozing off on long rides and planned late nights. And the one thing one hundred percent guaranteed to wake up […]

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Among other things, I need a new agent

Yesterday was a day so filled with blogging fodder that I decided to clean out the tupperware drawers instead of sitting down to the keyboard. Actually, I decided to go to bed, but I had to pack lunches first, and I was hating it, and I thought about what it was that I hated about packing lunches so much, and one thing was that I can never find lids to the adorable lunch tupperware. (Because we cannot use baggies anymore, […]

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One Sparkly Day

One Sparkly Day Originally uploaded by kjda You probably can’t tell, but Rory is wearing both a full snowsuit AND a ski jacket. I do not think she was cold.

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Off to Dallas

Off to Dallas Originally uploaded by kjda KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

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Dear Lily,

You must stay in bed. You have been up six times since I put you to bed 20 minutes ago, and you must stay in bed.  Your daddy is out of town. For the third–no, fourth–night this week. And every single night this week, without exception, a dog, a child, or 100 mile an hour winds, or all of the above, has woken me up more than once. And on two days this week, a school has woken me up […]

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Us on AOL’s Kitchen Daily

I think everyone will get a small giggle out of my quarantine story for AOL’s Kitchen Daily. Especially you, mom! Ah, those were the days.

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Explaining “I Did Not Love My Adopted Child” to My Very Real, Very Loved Daughter

In the the wake of the Torry Hanson case, I wrote a piece for Slate Magazine (where I’m a regular contributor to the DoubleX section) that my editors there titled “I Did Not Love My Adopted Child,” or, if you came to it from the first page, “I Didn’t Love My Foreign Adopted Kid at First, Either.” I liked the second title better–and actually proposed changing the first; I wanted to call it “Adoption Sucks–But that’s No Reason Not to Do It.” […]

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Guess What Day It Is?

Guess What Day It Is? Originally uploaded by kjda KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

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Wyatt needed one too.

Wyatt needed one too. Originally uploaded by kjda KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

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When to Nix the 5-Second Rule (and When You’re Good to Chew)

Do I even have to define the 5-second rule for you? Of course not. It’s long since passed from winking mom commentary into the national vernacular. In fact, it’s moved from folk lore to science: there are actually multiple studies on when the “rule,” beloved of parents whose kids have dropped their only teething biscuit to the sidewalk, applies. So, does the 5-second rule stand up to science? Sometimes. Read more on Babble. There’s no great back story to this […]

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6-Year-Olds and Pedicures? So Wrong.

Last week, Sierra and Carolyn were discussing the places where kids just don’t belong. Bars. Comedy clubs. Nightclubs (I sense a theme here). I’ve got one more spot to add to the list, and it’s not even a place where you’re there to drink: Spas. No one who isn’t old enough to pay for her pampering with her own hard-earned cash belongs in a spa, and no 6-year-old needs a pedicure. As for spas actually meant for tots, I’m appalled. […]

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First we drilled

First we drilled Originally uploaded by kjda Well, first we went and bought a couple of things, like hinges, at our friend Seth’s hardware store. But this is why I am more fun than Daddy. I let sam do all the drilling.

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I've got Ten Mantras for Happier Parents (based on the research for my book, How to Be a Happier Parent). They've worked for me—want to try them?

Hi, I’m KJ. Can I send you something?