10 Things Guaranteed to Send You Into a Whirling Death Spiral of Depression

    • The old guys who sit in the bookstore once a week in the morning are much older than when I used to sit here and work. And some of them are gone.
    • Filling Easter baskets for four children. Buying three small, cheap Easter toys is fun and cute. Buying 12 is a depressing commentary on our disposable society.
    • Ditto Nicolas Kristof. Even though he’s on my list of people I want to be when I grow up, along with Po Bronson and Gail Collins and some other people I can’t think of right now because that would be too optimistic, thinking about life goals and whatnot. I’m not doing that until after I have more coffee.
    • That one song.
    • An email from a friend that says “OMG, Linda’s comment: so harsh!” and the knowledge that somewhere, at some point during my day, Linda’s comment on something or another awaits.
    • That’s such a cute baby! I don’t have a baby. I’m too old to have a baby. I don’t even want a baby. Look at that tired mother and the toddler on her other hand. I used to be her.
    • Clouds. Not the white fluffy kind. Those are ok. These are not them.
    • Spilled boiling water on a kid (and myself) this morning. Burn, blister, chaos. I have low standards for morning success but this definitely fell outside of even my lose goals. Child surely now detailing mad, inattentive, dangerous household to school nurse.
    • I think I’ve been hiding mental illness for years. Does everyone think I’ve been hiding mental illness for years? Is everyone hiding mental illness? How come some people are so good at it?
    • My subscription to the Atlantic must have run out. Also, O.
    • People in the U.S. spend more on plastic bags of various kinds and sizes, from snack to trash, annually than many families worldwide make in a year. NPR is not cheerful today. At least I missed Storycorps.
    • The mewling, scrabbling, demanding, persistent, deserving contents of my in-box. And my back seat.
    • That’s more than ten. I can think of more than ten things guaranteed to send me into a whirling death spiral of depression. That’s another one.
  • Oh, this is where I end the post with a little twist of good cheer, right? Buck up, we’ll all be dead soon. Meh.


    One Response to “10 Things Guaranteed to Send You Into a Whirling Death Spiral of Depression”

    1. Hope Perlman says:

      Okay, this really made me laugh. Not that I ENJOY other people’s misery. I swear I don’t. And I so agree with you on many of these. Nicholas Kristof, for one. I can’t hardly bear to read his headlines, let alone his pieces.