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KJ

Backsliding and Resolutions

By KJ / Tuesday, December 8, 2009

We just did a DoubleX round-up for the Washington Post on New Year’s resolutions (can’t link, it won’t be pub’d until the Sunday after Christmas), and I realized there’s something I forgot to say. I tend to make resolutions and changes twice a year: September, and New Year’s. (I make organizational and career resolutions, usually, which are both things I enjoy, so I really like making resolutions. I look forward to these moments that spur change. Anyway, this morning, as […]

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Mockery and the American Girl Doll

By KJ / Monday, December 7, 2009

I have just been mocked, mocked. So mocked. I told a friend–mother of a 4th grade girl–that this coming Wednesday, I will be taking Lily to Boston to the American Girl Doll store, to buy her a doll. We do not own an American Girl Doll. We do not own one, and Lily has been asking, for the past year, when she would be old enough for one. Soon, I kept saying. Her friends began to acquire them, one by […]

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It’s Here!

By KJ / Saturday, December 5, 2009

It’s Here! Originally uploaded by kjda Genuine snow, about 2 inches of it. Enough to sled on and toss a small snowball or two. Enough to force me to finally get out the snow pants. Enough to thrill everyone and count as Rory’s true first snow. She loved it. The funny thing is, we went to a Waldorf winter fair today. Waldorf being what it is, there is no Santa, but there IS a King of Winter, who was walking […]

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On Books

By KJ / Thursday, December 3, 2009

Sam likes Tin Tin. And that is it, that is what Sam likes to read, Tin Tin. He liked to be read to–almost anything, and most especially Harry Potter. But to read to himself he likes…Tin Tin. So tonight I took him to the bookstore, put him on one side of the shelves and me on another. We would gather lots of books, I said, and he could read the first pages, and see what he liked. And I gathered–oh, […]

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Two Small Miracles

By KJ / Wednesday, December 2, 2009

i am finally coming out of the flu fog, with this to report: This morning in the car, Rory was humming a little repetitive hum, a sort of non-song, over and over, and Wy chose to be outraged. You can’t do that! It’s annoying! She’s being annoying! Rory, everyone in your class will say, that’s so annoying! Mommy, Rory is being annoying! After a few miles of this, I asked Wyatt why he thought Rory was humming. (Rory, very satisfied-ly, […]

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Bumpkin City

By KJ / Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Bumpkin City Originally uploaded by kjda I have spent my entire adult life in either Manhattan, Chicago or a small town. The result is that in any fast food chain other than Starbucks, I gaze at the menu like I’ve never seen it before, desperately interpreting. Happily, Panera Bread was not crowded, and my Dr. Pepper and blueberry muffin are bringing my feeling-a-little- better self much joy. KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

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I have the Flu, and I hate Everybody

By KJ / Sunday, November 29, 2009

Just when it was getting kind of easy and nice, it developed that it’s only easy and nice if I don’t feel like total crap.. I have yelled mercilessly at each and everyone of my children today, and that makes me feel even worse. Bleh.

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Happy Thanksgiving!

By KJ / Thursday, November 26, 2009

Happy Thanksgiving! Originally uploaded by kjda Well, ok, that’s a Christmas tree. Which we put up, because yesterday we actually had time to do it, and not in between rushing to one thing and racing off to another. Of course, one reason that we can do that is that what you see there is a big ole FAKE tree. Yep, right here in New England. I grew up in the south, with a very practical mother and an allergy to […]

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Tonight They Played Monopoly

By KJ / Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Sam and Lily’s favorite friends came over tonight, and all was quiet and peaceful in the playroom–oddly so. Rory was taking advantage of some snuggle time on the couch with the grown-ups (I’d be lying if I didn’t admit that was kind of annoying, but I try to keep in mind that her “family age” is different from her real age, and she needs all the snuggle time she can get), but what were the others doing? Playing Monopoly. This […]

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Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar…

By KJ / Monday, November 23, 2009

I came in from clearing out the garden for winter a few days ago and found Rory–who’d been outside a few minutes before–sobbing at the top of the stairs. Wailing. I ran up–I thought she was hurt–and she took one look at me and ran away, shouting no! No! Well, that’s never happened before. So I followed her. No! No! I don’t want you! This is dreadful. Did she come in and feel like she couldn’t find us? Did something […]

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Jingle Bells Rules

By KJ / Friday, November 20, 2009

It is now time, approximately seven minutes into the holiday season, to establish a set of rules regarding the song “Jingle Bells,” which shall be as follows: No version of “Jingle Bells” involving either Batman or sledding accidents shall be sung in my presence at any time. No one shall attempt to work out devious ways to get around rule one. The singing of songs involving “Catman” or replacing the names of Batman and Robin with those of your siblings […]

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One Less Kid Than You Have

By KJ / Thursday, November 19, 2009

A wise parent once told me that the easiest number of kids to deal with was “one fewer than however many kids you have.” It’s not the smoothest statement, but it is so true–if you have three kids, going out with two is a piece of cake, and so on. My new addition, even less smooth, is that the easiest number of kids to deal with is one less than the number of kids you wish you didn’t have. Actually, […]

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The Unbearable Unfairness of Windows

By KJ / Wednesday, November 18, 2009

It gets dark early, here. Which means if we go anywhere in the warm, cozy car, all snuggled into our car seats, any time after 4:30…sleep is very likely to overtake both Rory and Wyatt. And I am sorry, but you CANNOT NAP after 4:30 here. In fact, you really can’t nap at all, with occasional exceptions for illness, early dozing off on long rides and planned late nights. And the one thing one hundred percent guaranteed to wake up […]

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Never Best Left Unspoken

By KJ / Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Let us say, for example, that you have something you would prefer the children not discuss at this precise moment. In our house, that list could include: Monkey Bars The book “Snuggle Puppy” Izzy’s upcoming birthday party Chinese class Rory’s Mama Deena and Baba Mike baths The one thing we are guaranteed to talk about is exactly whatever you–or, in this case, obviously I–would prefer that we just not, at that particular moment. I am happy at any moment of […]

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What I Thought Kids Were Like

By KJ / Sunday, November 15, 2009

What I Thought Kids Were Like Originally uploaded by kjda Before I had them. This may be one of the reasons I struggled so long with actually having them. It also took a really long time to get them to this point–lots of initial direction in getting the new puzzle together, I mean. Rory, in particular, still prefers to have you hand her two pieces that go together. But she is to the point where I can give her a […]

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Sudden Harmony

By KJ / Saturday, November 14, 2009

It just suddenly occurred to me in a blinding flash of clarity  that there is absolutely no reason at all for us to own a harmonica. None. So now we don’t.

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I Want Rory to Go Back to China! I Hate Rory!

By KJ / Friday, November 13, 2009

Oh, pick your jaw up off the floor–that’s not me talking, it’s Wyatt. Wyatt, out of the blue, today in the car. (Well, not quite out of the blue–Heather’s house was out Rory’s window, and not his, and that was pretty much unforgivable).  I DON’T WANT RORY TO COME HERE FROM CHINA! Did we pull the car over and have a special moment? Nope.  Me: Well, Rory belongs to us now. She will always live with us. Rory: But Wyatt, […]

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Did I Say We Were Cutting Back

By KJ / Thursday, November 12, 2009

Did I Say We Were Cutting Back Originally uploaded by kjda On sugar and fat? KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

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Lunch, and all the Angst it Entails

By KJ / Thursday, November 12, 2009

Lily slipped into the bathroom yesterday and very nicely asked “Have you packed my lunch yet?” I’ve made your sandwich, but not the rest. Why? Can I do it? Can I do it and have FOUR THINGS? Wyatt and Sam were both down with a touch of flu, so the morning rush was both eased and compromised–so why not? One fruit, I told her, and a little of whatever else you want. I gave her two containers and she put […]

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Feed ‘Em Real Food, and Acquire My Copy of Tinkerbell and the Lost Treasure

By KJ / Monday, November 9, 2009

Somehow these two things don’t go together very well…But I am reviewing Tinkerbell and the Lost Treasure this week, and I know it’s not one we’ll want to watch again (we’re not really much for watching movies over and over; we tend towards shorter shows so that more kids can have their favorite). I’d love for someone else to enjoy it, especially if there are any real Tinkerbell fans out there (full disclosure: the first Tinkerbell movie only lasted five […]

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This Kid Has Game.

By KJ / Sunday, November 8, 2009

This Kid Has Game. Originally uploaded by kjda I don’t need help! When it’s said with a big smile by someone determinedly flailing away on the ice, that’s a deeply charming sentiment. The tough, resolute athlete tool it on the butt again and again, but after 45 minutes she was at least moving under her own steam. Some. Tonight Rob showed her some pictures of the other kids skiing. "What about me?" This one was born to live here. All […]

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Ready to go

By KJ / Sunday, November 8, 2009

Ready to go Originally uploaded by kjda It must be said that Rory has no idea what she’s getting into here. She’s seen Sam skate, of course, but she has no concept of "ice" except from the freezer. KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

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Wyatt accepts help

By KJ / Sunday, November 8, 2009

Wyatt accepts help Originally uploaded by kjda KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

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The Big Green Womens Hockey Team

By KJ / Sunday, November 8, 2009

The Big Green Womens Hockey Team Originally uploaded by kjda And their many many fans. KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

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Still Spooky After All These Days

By KJ / Sunday, November 8, 2009

Still Spooky After All These Days Originally uploaded by kjda KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

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Why a Camel?

By KJ / Saturday, November 7, 2009

Why a Camel? Originally uploaded by kjda Got me. But it did catch my attention, strolling along at Duke in a gorgeous day that smells oh so faintly of whatever it is that makes North Carolina smell different than anywhere else. It’s probably more interesting unexplained. Off to eat BBQ with a pack of Dukies. These are mostly male Dukies, and mostly a decade and more older than us, because Rob forms part of the young blood they are bringing […]

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Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder

By KJ / Friday, November 6, 2009

Rob and I are in North Carolina, a two night trip, the first time we’ve been away from home since adopting Rory. She seems fine–we talked to her on the phone, and she’s enjoying the time with her beloved babysitter (who’s been known to be much nicer than her beloved mommy). It was the first time we’d talked on the phone, and she was very pleased–this mommy? this our mommy? It’s mommy! It’s good to be here. I have nothing […]

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What I Think About When I Think About Running

By KJ / Friday, November 6, 2009

What I Thinl About When I Think About Running Originally uploaded by kjda How many people do you think were really walking and only started running because they heard you coming? KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

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How to Become a Patient Flyer

By KJ / Thursday, November 5, 2009

How to Become a Patient Flyer Originally uploaded by kjda Once you’ve flown halfway around the world and back with three or four kids, a little matter of a 2 plus hour delay is nothing when you’re sans spawn. Lalala, we said at each successive delay. Magazines were read. Burgers were eaten. And eventually, a functional plane was located, we flew, and here we are. Watching the other traveler get all bent out of shape was just gravy. KJ Dell’Antonia […]

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Ouch–Another Bad Morning

By KJ / Wednesday, November 4, 2009

The power went out this morning, for all of about 20 seconds. How badly can this throw us off? You’d be surprised. First of all, many clocks no longer functioned, but the real issue was the alarm clock that announces that it’s time to brush teeth–or rather, time to shift gears. You cannot argue with an automated bugle. You CAN argue with mommy, or at least you can try. You can’t win, but you can burn a lot of energy […]

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Book Contest: Help Save My Morning Routine!

By KJ / Tuesday, November 3, 2009

I’m the quintessential reformed Tardy Mom, Parenting Magazine’s poster child on the subject, and it’s true–our mornings, while not particularly resembling clockwork in any way, are now calmer, cooler and vastly more timely.  Setting a load time and sticking to it, of refusing to serve breakfast to any child not already dressed, of setting up an actual alarm clock to ring when breakfast is over and tooth-brushing time has arrived–those have worked wonders (thanks, Mary Caroline Walker! I’d link to […]

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Lots of Excellent Reasons for a Happy Blog

By KJ / Monday, November 2, 2009

You’re all absolutely right. There are many reasons for a rosy blog– picture. One, which no one mentioned but I’ve thought of often, is that sometimes complaining lets a negative attitude fester and breathe, and no one–least of all me–needs that. As for the comments from the peanut gallery–and by that, I mean friends and family, not real commenters–oh, I do get that. I have had to remind a couple of people that the first rule of reading the blog […]

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Biscuit books, and I’m Sick of the Happy Happy

By KJ / Saturday, October 31, 2009

The book I posted was Biscuit’s Halloween. Many of the Biscuit books include the Asian cousin, or whatever she is. Don’t forget I warned you that they’re also inane…harmless, and with nice big flaps, but you won’t WANT to read them. Without going into too much detail, because I’m tired, I just want to say that I get a little tired of what sometimes feels like everyone else’s happy happy adoption blogs. It’s not that anything in particular has happened […]

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Happy Halloween

By KJ / Saturday, October 31, 2009

Happy Halloween Originally uploaded by kjda KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

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On the way out

By KJ / Saturday, October 31, 2009

On the way out Originally uploaded by kjda Now that she grasps what trick or treating is, she may never come back. KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

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The Bat heads out

By KJ / Saturday, October 31, 2009

The Bat heads out Originally uploaded by kjda KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

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A Bat

By KJ / Saturday, October 31, 2009

A Bat Originally uploaded by kjda This was once a baby bunting from Old Navy. I think this is it’s fourth wearing. KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

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A ghost and Blossom, the Powerpuff Girl

By KJ / Saturday, October 31, 2009

A ghost and Blossom, the Powerpuff Girl Originally uploaded by kjda KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

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Woof!

By KJ / Saturday, October 31, 2009

Woof! Originally uploaded by kjda Fourth go for the puppy costume. KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

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And they’re off…

By KJ / Saturday, October 31, 2009

And they’re off… Originally uploaded by kjda Trick or Treating: Not My Department KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

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And they’re off…

By KJ / Saturday, October 31, 2009

And they’re off… Originally uploaded by kjda Trick or Treating: Not My Department KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

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By KJ / Friday, October 30, 2009

Just in case you wonder why I’m not posting (on my fresh and changing website): Here’s what I’m up to tonight: The Third Annual Spooky Trail! I wrote about it for Wondertime last year if you’d like to check it out.

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Because I Love Halloween

By KJ / Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Because I Love Halloween Originally uploaded by kjda And because I love Sam. KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

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Playing Family

By KJ / Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Lily, Rory and Wyatt are devotedly and cooperatively playing an enthusiastic game of family with Rory’s doll house. (“Special for me!” but she lets them play. Sometimes.) So far I’ve heard the children go for an airplane ride, someone prepare dinner and ask how a school day was, a very convincing crying baby (that caused Rob to worriedly consider a rescue, but I was pretty sure it was faux, and I was right) and now, some kind of building. The […]

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Being means WAY more than acting.

By KJ / Monday, October 26, 2009

There’s been a shift again. Emotion is nothing if not seismic in this family, but this has been a nice, gradual drifting of continents. Rory likes to perform, but sometimes I have felt that she was putting on a father frantic show for us–a show of happiness, a show of belonging, as if her performing it would convince us all. Sometimes she’d be just sitting there, kind of expressionless, and I’d look at her, and I’d get this frantic grin—not […]

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A Halloween Book that looks like us.

By KJ / Saturday, October 24, 2009

A Halloween Book that looks like us. Originally uploaded by kjda I know my kids’ books–I co-authored a book about them, and I review them for DoubleX–but I have to admit that the advent of Rory has made me more aware of race in the pictures. That’s not really true–I was always aware–but more appreciative of books that look like us, and the Biscuit books–while not always my favorite, because they tend somewhat towards the inane–are good that way. The […]

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A New Take on the Temper Tantrum

By KJ / Friday, October 23, 2009

Last night was windy–and where we live, that means it sounds like a freight train is coming over the hill. We lay in bed, listening, and began to hear, periodically, another sound: BANG BANG BANG. Or sometimes BANG. Or BANG BANG. It was not rhythmic, or constant, as you would expect of something the wind was blowing. And it not eventually result in the reappearance of a child, as you would expect from a kid-created noise. It just kept periodically […]

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Spreading the Wealth

By KJ / Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Periodically, I vow to just tell them what I want them to do, rather than yelling at them for what I DON’T. In the interest of not complaining–or at least not complaining without making an attempt to change things–today I instituted a couple of improvements. Every day I come in with a big pile of things from the car–hats and mittens (so sad, already) and lunch boxes and bits of trash and sundry. Today I took along a single bag […]

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What, Exactly, is Complaining?

By KJ / Monday, October 19, 2009

Two DoubleX friends are embarking on a month-long attempt to quit their kvetching that they have dubbed the Whiners’ Guide to Not Complaining. In it, they agree that although their wry, sarcastic style has led them to great personal and professional success, they could perhaps consider altering it just a tad–just a smidgen, perhaps–in an attempt not so much to alter their own black-humored, cynical personas but just to be more mindful of what’s hipster veneer and what’s becoming more […]

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I Blame the Kitchen Island

By KJ / Saturday, October 17, 2009

We have, in our kitchen–oh, who am I kidding, it is the kitchen–a very large island composed of granite tiles and a sink. Behind it lies the 3’x9′ kitchen space; in front, four barstools and then the living room. This means that when friends are there I can cook and be in the thick of things, it means kids can do homework and art projects and I can empty the dishwasher, it tends to mean that I absolutely never sit […]

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