Connecting the Dots

One Sparkly Day Originally uploaded by kjda

I didn’t lie. I never lie to them, but I do sin by ommission, as it were. We did have to leave early this morning. There was a “because.”  Everyone did need to go brush their teeth before the usual alarm. No one really needed to know why. But Sam guessed, and guessed right. The final flu shots lay in wait.

Mellow, Relatively Speaking Originally uploaded by kjda This was yesterday, actually, at the bookstore. Lily read a Dora book that I refused to read–which was of course a serious bonus. Coffee was had, a small tantrum thrown for reasons too dull to describe here (suffice to say that no, I won’t buy TWO copies of Berenstein Bears Valentine’s Party–in fact, I can’t believe I bought one.) And we skied a few runs, had a Lily friend over and her mom […]

Killing Time, Coloring Tongues Originally uploaded by kjda We have half an hour before Chinese class, and we are spending it wisely. KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

Caitlin Flanagan just published a provocative piece in the Atlantic about why the “garden curriculum” created by Alice Waters and running rampant in California is a bad idea. I agreed with her (here on DoubleX)–not because I think there’s anything wrong with a garden in a school, or because I think the school gardens represent a particular affront to immigrants and migrant workers (her token inflammatory hook–man, she’s good at that–I’ve yet to master it)–but because, as she finally says […]

Rory is So SAD. Originally uploaded by kjda Wyatt was invited to a birthday party, and Rory…was not. Neither was Lily, but that is ok by her. Rory, in the other hand, is very upset. She even had Wyatt convinced to skip the party and come home to play Mario Wii with her…until I decreed the afternoon a Wii free zone and freed him up to go to the party. She cried all the way there…fortunately the party hosts couldn’t […]

I took only Rory and Lily to dinner at the home of one of their friends recently. New friends, a family I didn’t know, along with another family we were already acquainted with (the boys were home on the sick side with Rob). The new friends have two daughters, 2 and 4, and although I don’t have the impression their girls are peaceful and retired types, I’m not sure they were prepared for Rory–who took one look at their large, […]

Today I shall accomplish great things, many many great things. And in honor of those things, I will post them here, to share, as the day goes by. I have already accomplished the first: Laundry Basket Reclamation. When we returned from China, in July, I put all the things we acquired there into a laundry basket and sat it on the dog crate in our bedroom (which, as you can gather from that statement, is a very relaxing and well-designed […]

Happy New Year! Originally uploaded by kjda For us, that meant fondue with friends, a neighbor’s bonfire and bedtime! KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

New Years Resolution 1 Originally uploaded by kjda The kids get more chores. Christmas is a good time to be reminded of the abundance that we share…and also of the work that goes into it. It’s time, I think, to get more help (and accept some imperfections…). I know, the most common kid-related resolutions must be stuff like “spend more time with them” or “yell less” (made that one, anyway) and “have more patience” (ditto). But we have had such […]

I do think we managed to savor Christmas. That Lego train? Put together in full by Sam and Grandpa, with occasional help from other kids. We played dominos (Mexican Train! from Lily to Sam!), did puzzles and baked cookies. Carols were sung, hummed and whistled all across the house, although not by me, because I have a cough and cold I can’t shake. Candy canes were eaten, stockings emptied, and even, in a few cases, thank-you notes written. And now […]

Holiday Update: Return to one-on-one Originally uploaded by kjda My folks are here, so we have one adult per kid. Very relaxing–except for the 800 piece Lego train that was part of Santa’s contribution. We may be done by New Year’s. KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

Yesterday was a day so filled with blogging fodder that I decided to clean out the tupperware drawers instead of sitting down to the keyboard. Actually, I decided to go to bed, but I had to pack lunches first, and I was hating it, and I thought about what it was that I hated about packing lunches so much, and one thing was that I can never find lids to the adorable lunch tupperware. (Because we cannot use baggies anymore, […]

Holiday concert Originally uploaded by kjda Solemn and ready to sing. KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

Me, solo usually translates to me, shrieking, but tonight Rob missed Sam’s holiday concert–which means me and Lily, Rory and Wyatt all bundled into our chairs for an hour and a half, collectively wondering “why they sing one more song? Why?” and “When is it time to go home?” as we watch K-8 each step up for their time on stage. Some of us just wonder it a little more audibly than others. That, plus pizza, would usually be a […]

The Person I Want to Be Originally uploaded by kjda Today, after school and Sam’s early dismissal and a fairly lengthy incident that seemed as if it was all Wyatt’s fault for having a temper tantrum and hitting me in the preschool parking lot but was really my fault for running late, we made snickerdoodles. Sam and I put the ingredients together, Lily ran the mixer and everbody rolled balls on cinnamon and sugar, and everyone was happy, and Sam […]

Today’s DoubleX post (I only link here if I think you might be interested): What if Santa isn’t bringing you exactly what you want? Wyatt wants his own Nintendo. Despite the post, I remain tempted.

We just did a DoubleX round-up for the Washington Post on New Year’s resolutions (can’t link, it won’t be pub’d until the Sunday after Christmas), and I realized there’s something I forgot to say. I tend to make resolutions and changes twice a year: September, and New Year’s. (I make organizational and career resolutions, usually, which are both things I enjoy, so I really like making resolutions. I look forward to these moments that spur change. Anyway, this morning, as […]

I have just been mocked, mocked. So mocked. I told a friend–mother of a 4th grade girl–that this coming Wednesday, I will be taking Lily to Boston to the American Girl Doll store, to buy her a doll. We do not own an American Girl Doll. We do not own one, and Lily has been asking, for the past year, when she would be old enough for one. Soon, I kept saying. Her friends began to acquire them, one by […]

It’s Here! Originally uploaded by kjda Genuine snow, about 2 inches of it. Enough to sled on and toss a small snowball or two. Enough to force me to finally get out the snow pants. Enough to thrill everyone and count as Rory’s true first snow. She loved it. The funny thing is, we went to a Waldorf winter fair today. Waldorf being what it is, there is no Santa, but there IS a King of Winter, who was walking […]

Sam likes Tin Tin. And that is it, that is what Sam likes to read, Tin Tin. He liked to be read to–almost anything, and most especially Harry Potter. But to read to himself he likes…Tin Tin. So tonight I took him to the bookstore, put him on one side of the shelves and me on another. We would gather lots of books, I said, and he could read the first pages, and see what he liked. And I gathered–oh, […]

i am finally coming out of the flu fog, with this to report: This morning in the car, Rory was humming a little repetitive hum, a sort of non-song, over and over, and Wy chose to be outraged. You can’t do that! It’s annoying! She’s being annoying! Rory, everyone in your class will say, that’s so annoying! Mommy, Rory is being annoying! After a few miles of this, I asked Wyatt why he thought Rory was humming. (Rory, very satisfied-ly, […]

Bumpkin City Originally uploaded by kjda I have spent my entire adult life in either Manhattan, Chicago or a small town. The result is that in any fast food chain other than Starbucks, I gaze at the menu like I’ve never seen it before, desperately interpreting. Happily, Panera Bread was not crowded, and my Dr. Pepper and blueberry muffin are bringing my feeling-a-little- better self much joy. KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

Just when it was getting kind of easy and nice, it developed that it’s only easy and nice if I don’t feel like total crap.. I have yelled mercilessly at each and everyone of my children today, and that makes me feel even worse. Bleh.

Happy Thanksgiving! Originally uploaded by kjda Well, ok, that’s a Christmas tree. Which we put up, because yesterday we actually had time to do it, and not in between rushing to one thing and racing off to another. Of course, one reason that we can do that is that what you see there is a big ole FAKE tree. Yep, right here in New England. I grew up in the south, with a very practical mother and an allergy to […]

Sam and Lily’s favorite friends came over tonight, and all was quiet and peaceful in the playroom–oddly so. Rory was taking advantage of some snuggle time on the couch with the grown-ups (I’d be lying if I didn’t admit that was kind of annoying, but I try to keep in mind that her “family age” is different from her real age, and she needs all the snuggle time she can get), but what were the others doing? Playing Monopoly. This […]

It is now time, approximately seven minutes into the holiday season, to establish a set of rules regarding the song “Jingle Bells,” which shall be as follows: No version of “Jingle Bells” involving either Batman or sledding accidents shall be sung in my presence at any time. No one shall attempt to work out devious ways to get around rule one. The singing of songs involving “Catman” or replacing the names of Batman and Robin with those of your siblings […]

It gets dark early, here. Which means if we go anywhere in the warm, cozy car, all snuggled into our car seats, any time after 4:30…sleep is very likely to overtake both Rory and Wyatt. And I am sorry, but you CANNOT NAP after 4:30 here. In fact, you really can’t nap at all, with occasional exceptions for illness, early dozing off on long rides and planned late nights. And the one thing one hundred percent guaranteed to wake up […]

Let us say, for example, that you have something you would prefer the children not discuss at this precise moment. In our house, that list could include: Monkey Bars The book “Snuggle Puppy” Izzy’s upcoming birthday party Chinese class Rory’s Mama Deena and Baba Mike baths The one thing we are guaranteed to talk about is exactly whatever you–or, in this case, obviously I–would prefer that we just not, at that particular moment. I am happy at any moment of […]

What I Thought Kids Were Like Originally uploaded by kjda Before I had them. This may be one of the reasons I struggled so long with actually having them. It also took a really long time to get them to this point–lots of initial direction in getting the new puzzle together, I mean. Rory, in particular, still prefers to have you hand her two pieces that go together. But she is to the point where I can give her a […]

It just suddenly occurred to me in a blinding flash of clarity  that there is absolutely no reason at all for us to own a harmonica. None. So now we don’t.

Oh, pick your jaw up off the floor–that’s not me talking, it’s Wyatt. Wyatt, out of the blue, today in the car. (Well, not quite out of the blue–Heather’s house was out Rory’s window, and not his, and that was pretty much unforgivable).  I DON’T WANT RORY TO COME HERE FROM CHINA! Did we pull the car over and have a special moment? Nope.  Me: Well, Rory belongs to us now. She will always live with us. Rory: But Wyatt, […]

Did I Say We Were Cutting Back Originally uploaded by kjda On sugar and fat? KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

This Kid Has Game. Originally uploaded by kjda I don’t need help! When it’s said with a big smile by someone determinedly flailing away on the ice, that’s a deeply charming sentiment. The tough, resolute athlete tool it on the butt again and again, but after 45 minutes she was at least moving under her own steam. Some. Tonight Rob showed her some pictures of the other kids skiing. "What about me?" This one was born to live here. All […]

Ready to go Originally uploaded by kjda It must be said that Rory has no idea what she’s getting into here. She’s seen Sam skate, of course, but she has no concept of "ice" except from the freezer. KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

Wyatt accepts help Originally uploaded by kjda KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

The Big Green Womens Hockey Team Originally uploaded by kjda And their many many fans. KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

Still Spooky After All These Days Originally uploaded by kjda KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

Why a Camel? Originally uploaded by kjda Got me. But it did catch my attention, strolling along at Duke in a gorgeous day that smells oh so faintly of whatever it is that makes North Carolina smell different than anywhere else. It’s probably more interesting unexplained. Off to eat BBQ with a pack of Dukies. These are mostly male Dukies, and mostly a decade and more older than us, because Rob forms part of the young blood they are bringing […]

What I Thinl About When I Think About Running Originally uploaded by kjda How many people do you think were really walking and only started running because they heard you coming? KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

How to Become a Patient Flyer Originally uploaded by kjda Once you’ve flown halfway around the world and back with three or four kids, a little matter of a 2 plus hour delay is nothing when you’re sans spawn. Lalala, we said at each successive delay. Magazines were read. Burgers were eaten. And eventually, a functional plane was located, we flew, and here we are. Watching the other traveler get all bent out of shape was just gravy. KJ Dell’Antonia […]